Not Skynet

I went to Borders the other day with Seth. We found a book called Robopocalypse.

Me: Ro-bo-poke-olips. What kind of stupid book name is this?

Seth: Why? It’s about robots taking over the world, right?

Me: Yeah. But ROBO-POKO-LIPS? Sounds dumb.

Seth: It’s pronounced Robopocalypse.

Me: That’s what I said. ROBOPOKOLIPS. ROBOPOKOLIPS. ROBOPOKOLIPS.

Seth:…Are you retarded?

Me: As a writer and obviously superior human being I deem this title retarded. No one can pronounce it. The correct combination of robot and apocalypse should be Robocalypse.

I stand by my statement.

Philosophy

Sometimes when I feel extra smart or extra depressed I attempt to read philosophy. By philosophy I mean I go to the Wiki page for Slavoj Zizek or Hegelianism (are these even considered philosophy? Maybe I just mean whenever I try to expand my mind) and try to understand it.

At first reading it gives me a fuzzy feeling, like it’s so incredible that another human being has actually thought this whole thing through. But after awhile I just stop understanding. It’s as if my brain has reached it’s limit and is no longer able to comprehend. It’s as if I’ve reached the point where I will just never be able to grasp it. I used to think of this as my ‘threshold’ and tell myself that one day I will experience enough of life to understand what is being written. But it doesn’t change. I think maybe that is my limit, and I should just stick to things that I understand. Like Robot Unicorn Attack and Philip K Dick.

And sometimes I just find myself bored by it. Bored. And then I feel guilty (Catholic guilt? Hippie guilt? Pretentious intellectual guilt?), but it doesn’t last long. Who ask them to make it so boring? Cannot list it out in simple point form is it?

Mandatory Lyric Post

As an emotional human being with emotions and all that stuff, I am obliged to copy paste lyrics to songs that have touched me. Fortunately I have pretty good taste in music (in my own opinion). I’ll try not to post up weird stuff like Bat for Lashes although she is heavenly.

So what if you catch me,
Where would we land?
In somebody’s life
For taking his hands
Sing to me hope as she’s
Thrown on the sand
All of our work
Is rated again

And I was sure you’d follow through
The world was turned to blue(so fair)
When you’d hide your songs would die
So I’d hide yours with mine
All my words were bound to fail
But I know you won’t fail

– Fair, Remy Zero (yeah, that Smallville band. would you turn down that amount of money to not be associated with a primetime lameass tv series? yeah, I thought so. screw artistic integrity man)

The Problem with Harem Pants

I don’t think you even need to ask what the problem with harem pants is. Have you seen harem pants? The only question I have here is why are they called harem pants? The word harem evokes beautiful exotic women with voluminous, semi-transparent pieces of clothing, not someone with their crotch halfway down their legs.

No, wait, I have another question. WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT THEIR CROTCH AT THE SAME AREA AS THEIR KNEES? I don’t care if it’s not your real crotch, everyone knows where your real crotch is, so you’re obviously not doing it for the mystery. You’re doing it because of reasons I don’t understand.

There is nothing attractive about a fallen crotch. Not the last time I checked, which was never, because I had never had any reason to wonder about FALLEN CROTCHES. Oh my god, I feel irreversibly tainted just typing that sentence. Goddamn. Screw you    harempants.

I’d rather chew off my own ear.

Not a Stagnant Pond of Mulch

This is my attempt to keep sharp my skills of writing, regardless of the fact that I am actually a writer because there are many kinds of writing in this world and I do not want to be stuck with the mindless regurgitory sort.

I intend to write interesting, meaningful things, but will most likely end up rambling and ranting against random things (like harem pants). But it doesn’t matter, so long as I write (or quote, or copy-paste).

At this moment, I’ve recently started classes for my master’s while juggling a full time job and worrying about a wedding next year. Why do people need to have ‘weddings’ anyway? Why can’t we just be avowed to each other and be done with it? My marriage needs all those people meh? All those people going to come when I need a babysitter, or a housesitter or a furniture mover next time kah? No right? Then? My marriage is between me and my partner. Two people, not two hundred.

Anyway. I’m also exercising my mind so that I’ll be a bit more adventurous when it comes to freelancing. Variety is the spice of life yes? And nobody likes a stagnant pond of mulch.